hit tracker

The ‘Middle Wife’ STORY OF THE DAY.!

YOU MAY HAVE SEEN THIS BEFORE…BUT STILL GOOD FOR A LAUGH… The ‘Middle Wife’ by an Anonymous 2nd Grade Teacher I’ve been teaching now for about fifteen years.

I have two kids myself, but the best birth story I know is the one I saw in my own second grade classroom a few years back.

When I was a kid, I loved show-and-tell..

So I always have a few sessions with my students. It helps them get over shyness and usually, show-and-tell is pretty tame.
Kids bring in pet turtles, model airplanes, pictures of fish they catch, stuff like that. And I never, ever place any boundaries or limitations on them.

If they want to lug it in to school and talk about it, they’re welcome.

Well, one day this little girl, Erica, a very bright, very outgoing kid, takes her turn and waddles up to the front of the class with a pillow

stuffed under her sweater. She holds up a snapshot of an infant. ‘This is Luke, my baby brother, and. I’m going to tell you about his birthday.’

First, Mom and Dad made him as a symbol of their love, and then Dad put a seed in my Mom’s stomach, and Luke grew in there. He ate for nine months through an umbrella cord.’

She’s standing there with her hands on the pillow, and I’m trying not to laugh and wishing I had my camcorder with me. The kids are watching her in amazement. Then, about two Saturdays ago, my Mom starts going, ‘Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh!’

Erica puts a hand behind her back and groans. ‘She walked around the house for, like an hour, ‘Oh, oh, oh!’ (Now this kid is doing a hysterical duck walk and groaning.)
’My Dad called the middle wife. She delivers babies, but she doesn’t have sign on the car like the Domino’s man.

They got my Mom to lie down in bed like this.’

(Then Erica lies down with her back against the wall.)’And then, pop! My Mom had this bag of water she kept in there in case he got thirsty, and it just blew up and spilled all over the bed, like psshhheew!’

(This kid has her legs spread with her little hands miming water flowing away. It was too much!) ‘Then the middle wife starts saying ‘push, push,’ and ‘breathe, breathe.

They started counting, but never even got past ten. Then, all of a sudden, out comes my brother. He was covered in yucky stuff that they all said it was from Mom’s play-center, so there must be a lot of toys inside there.

When he got out, the middle wife spanked him for crawling up in there in the first place.’ Then Erica stood up, took a big theatrical bow and returned to her seat.
I’m sure I applauded the loudest. Ever since then, when it’s Show-and-tell day, I bring my camcorder, just in case another ‘Middle Wife’ comes along.

Related Posts

Prayers are needed for Steve Irwin’s daughter Bindi. She is on her way to recovery but…!!

Bindi Irwin On The Path To Recovery After Ten Years Of Indescribable Pain And Misery Bindi Irwin, an Australian wildlife activist, recently spoke out about her health…

Passerby Who Killed Man Attacking Cop Learns His Fate

Note: this story, which first appeared in the news in February 2017, is being republished. There will be no criminal charges brought against the bystander who shot…

Jill Biden Is Leaving White House With Thousands Of Dollars In Gifts

First lady Jill Biden is on her way out of the White House with her husband, President Joe Biden, but she is bringing some expensive gifts with…

Alina Habba Says Federal Workers Not ‘America First’ Will Be Let Go

The U.S. Supreme Court has unanimously ruled that federal courts lack the authority to review visa revocations made by the Department of Homeland Security (DHS) in cases…

I Overheard My Husband Asking Our 4-Year-Old Son Not to Tell Me What He Saw – Days Later, I Uncovered the Shocking Truth Myself

Paige loves her career, even if it means being away from home a lot. However, when she returns from a business trip, she overhears a cryptic conversation…

People insist Elon Musk’s 4-year-old son called out PresidentTrump

While Elon Musk briefed people on a new executive order from the Oval Office, his 4-year-old son X Æ A-Xii – who goes by X – dug…

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *