One of the most agonizing and devastating experiences a person may go through is miscarriage. It evokes emotions of melancholy, deep sorrow, and occasionally remorse.
As the mind tries to accept the heartbreaking news of a change in circumstances, many parents experience shock and bewilderment upon learning of the miscarriage.
Suddenly, it seems as though every dream has been broken like a piece of glass.
The problem is made more challenging by the presence of anxiety for future pregnancies.
Unfortunately, a great number of couples have experienced this terrible event, and while each person copes with the loss differently, the agony is nearly always the same and rarely goes away.
After welcoming a boy into their lives, Whitney Quinton and her husband Brett always hoped to have more kids. Unfortunately, Whitney had health problems, including endometriosis, for which she had surgery, and she had trouble getting pregnant again.
For the first few weeks, everything appeared to be as usual. However, Whitney waited far longer than normal for the scans one day at a routine checkup, which was the first indication that something wasn’t right.
“I started getting worked up while we waited and my husband tried to reassure me it would be okay,” she explained to Love What Matters.
“My mind was going a thousand miles a minute thinking about all of the things she could have and how scared I was.”
The ensuing news was terrible. Their daughter’s long bones were not growing, her kidney was gone, and her heart was in a different place. Her limbs also had serious anomalies, according to the scans.
“[The radiologist] then stated in very direct terms, ‘You can terminate this pregnancy in the next three weeks if you are unable to handle this,’” Whitney wrote.
“I let out a scream I didn’t even know I was capable of. I fell to my knees and kept screaming and I immediately had sheets of tears streaming down my face. My husband continued to rub my back while he too wept.”
The following two weeks were extremely difficult, both physically and emotionally. She and her husband were tired and heartbroken.
Whitney was put through a lot of tests, all of which indicated that their daughter would have a very poor quality of life if she survived.
“Day and night, my husband and I cried. We felt like we had nothing left to give. Selfishly, we wanted her.”
“To us, she was perfect even though there were so many complications with her health. It didn’t matter to us. But as parents, you learn that it’s not about what’s best for you; it’s about what’s best for her and what she would want.”
They turned to God and prayed all the time, hoping to be given some clarity about the decision they were about to make.
“Two days later, we agreed that neither she nor I needed to suffer for one more minute. The induction was scheduled for a few days later, and the evening came for me to take the medication to induce labour. I would be delivering her the next day.”
“I had blurred vision and was so gravely ill that I told Brett I loved him many times in case I died, I was supposed to attend my work party the night before as I thought it would be better to have a distraction instead of sobbing all evening. The time came to leave and my health turned a corner.”
